The BNP’s lies are now just boring

Drone: The BNP sent a drone to deliver its message last night

Gone are the days when a British National Party (BNP) election broadcast had people climbing the walls of the BBC or the morbidly curious running home from work to catch it on the television. It appears few people bothered to watch last night’s election broadcast at all. It’s just not the same as it used to be; dropping everything to watch something irregular and rather vulgar on the box.

Much was made in the run up to the broadcast that this would be a particularly vulgar and racist attempt by the party to keep themselves in the news. Still, no-one really bit. Our own Nick Lowles, a man who can normally be gripped by the endless and monotonous boredom of Test cricket, summed up the BNP’s desperation best here

I watched it. I don’t really know why, it would teach me nothing I already did not know about the BNP’s warped vision of Britain and their never ending victim status. Sadly, for the BNP anyway, they have actually become a parody of themselves. Never mind the “cartoon” they had hung their tiny hopes on. Whether Ofcom had taken offence to it or not, it looked such poor quality that an early episode of the Simpsons would have looked glamorous in comparison.

And no Nick Griffin fronting up, either? Has the BNP finally learnt that he is an obnoxious, boring oaf that even Hitler would switch channels after watching just four seconds of that winking imbecile droning on about his apparent hardships? No, probably not.

It all had a rather “Spitting Image” quality about it, helped along in no small way by Griffin’s puppet and all round muppet, Simon Darby. He’s been christened the most boring man in fascism, by me, around sixty times. Now let’s make it sixty-one.

He is sooooooooooooo boring! Darby once alleged that he caught me trying to break into the BNP’s office at City Hall (from where the London electorate soon removed them). He was lying, obviously. We did bump into each other in a lift at City Hall once and he crossed his arms and stared at the walls of the lift before rushing onto his blog to declare there was some kind of invasion taking place of the BNP’s office, which in fairness, did stock more booze than the local Thresher off-license.

Last night Darby droned on behalf of the British National Party. He is a drone; his personal blog is full of uninteresting updates about his latest visit to Tescos and the lamb chops he bought for under a quid and then the countless hours he spends on his Xbox/Playstation killing the Vietcong (never the Nazis you understand.) A few years ago, Simon was alleged to have been involved in some kind of BNP sex-scandal. What tempted the alleged temptress remains a mystery, unless she was into bargain basement food, pork scratchings and a man who pretends at night he is some kind of 1970’s US Army killing machine.

Darby claimed people were “running scared” of the BNP because they are using the internet. Most people who run scared from the BNP are actually black or Asian people whom the BNP like to attack indiscriminately. Darby described their ‘censored’ cartoon as “ground-breaking” and again used the words “terrified” to describe the party’s detractors, because the BNP apparently says things that people at home are thinking. At this point I was thinking “get me a beer you complete and utter dingbat” but he did not say that. So I guess that’s just another political lie.

How about the claim that Nick Griffin travelled to Damascus and held peace talks with the butchers in the Syrian government? The BNP are claiming that Griffin helped stop military intervention in Syria by the British government! My, how this story has grown. It was in reality, just another begging mission by Griffin to another despot. He has a habit of making them. Now of course, the BNP claim he stopped an entire war! What actually happened is the BNP got lots of their young members to flood the comments section of the Daily Express online edition in praise of Griffin and then quoted the comments as if the paper had made them! Classy, eh?

“We’re the ones who put immigration to the top of the political agenda” Darby continued, still not having paused for breath or even moved from the spot where he was glued. Whether he actually believes that or not is a different matter. It’s quite clear that the BNP leads the way in racial hatred, which is quite different from the matter of immigration unless of course, you are in the BNP. So yes, in their tiny world, racist violence and genocide are the BNP’s policies on immigration. “Only the BNP will take action, and everyone knows that” he continued. Yes, yes we do. We know the BNP will be carting off Doctor’s and nurses in little vans to God knows where..

Then of course is the obvious problem with “Muslim grooming gangs” which for some reason, the BNP pretended had been censored out of the broadcast. If the BNP is really so set on helping police track down Muslim grooming gangs (which they are not) perhaps they should address this issue first which would be an enormous help to the police in Blackpool.

Darby also claimed it is the “BNP getting results”. All except at elections, where they have lost all but two of their elected representatives’ in just five years. That’s a good result for us, not for the BNP.

Then we heard from “others, just like you, voting BNP” and who should pop up? Mick Braun from Essex, a man who wants to throw acid at Asians. He was followed by Pete Molloy, who likes to hang around with wannabe terrorists who threaten to kill politicians. (Molloy no longer works with young children by the way). Standing next to Molloy with his back to camera was Adam Walker. The party are so ashamed of him, it appears he is no longer allowed to show his face for them in public.

After Molloy came Griffin’s own daughter, Jenny Matthys, who fled Belfast owing thousands of pounds to British workers and left piles of dog excrement on the floor of the flat she also bailed on paying rent from.

And then Robert West, fiddling with the door of a church that is not his, because he is not really a vicar even though he bought a dog collar on Ebay. West does not represent the Christian Church in the UK. All Churches in the UK are officially against racism and fascism.

We did finally get Griffin, right at the end. And yes, if this is the best they can do. It really is this end. It’s been an eventful five years for Griffin as an MEP. He’s lost more than three quarters of his members, sixty councillors, a member of the GLA, an MEP, has offered to sexually assault a TV personality and been caught with his trousers down in the car park of an Indian restaurant. Oh yes, he’s bankrupt too.

Vote this imbecilic liar out on May 22^nd.